Gallowmere Historia
Advertisement
Gallowmere Historia

Zarok's Lair. Oooh. Scary.

Zarok's Lair is MediEvil: Resurrection's eighteenth and final level.

Fortune

Oh no not more EVILNESS!, I don't tink I can take much more.
A HIDEOUS figure is comin' into focus. This man his heven Hugglier than YOU!
It is de Sorcerer, ZAROK himself!
De spirits say he will crush ya like a worm an' den ride roughshod over all Gallowmere til de end of days.
They're like dat sometimes, de spirits, they can be very downbeat.
Oh well, ease up on yo self - I don't tink them silly spirits quite realize the hincredible power of Hanubis stone my friend.
Now go and mash it up!

The Voodoo Witch

Dan's Private Journal entry

THE FINAL ENCOUNTER

And so I came face to face with The Big Z. Inevitably, he was on a balcony - he's always loved a big entrance. Although I suppose, with the size of his outfits, he needs one.

But what's this? Oh, not the old "first ye shall fight ye my whatsisfaces and my doo-dads" nonsense. Why do evil villains ALWAYS do this? He wants me to fight Lord Kardok first. Okay, hoofs-for-hands. Let's get it on!

Lord Kardok, like the golems before him, is no more. Your powers were weak, old man. And so on.

An army of Fazguls now rise against me. I finally find a use for that Anubis Stone thing. Somewhat impressively, I use it to evoke my own undead army - the fallen heroes from the Battle of Gallowmere! I'm not ashamed to reveal that the sight of my old friends brought a tear to my eye. Or maybe it was the smell - I think some of my former comrades may have been "on the turn".

The Fazguls, too, are rendered unto dust. It's lucky I'm not asthmatic.

I know what's going to happen now. I just bet he turns himself into some kind of horrible monstrous form. I just hope it's not a snake. I can't stand snakes. Be a buffalo. Be a buffalo.

It's a snake.

I beat the giant snake! I beat the giant snake! Look, there's bits of it all over the place - it's like a clearance sale at a giant snake manufacturers… hang on. Zarok's back. He's turning into his humanoid form again… uh-oh.

Cool! A piece of masonry crushed him to death! I'll never say a bad word about cowboy builders again. What's more, Al-Zalam has now been freed from my skull. Now I know how migraine sufferers feel in those advertising parchments.

Well, that was spectacular. The whole place just collapsed. I only got out by the skin of my misaligned teeth. I must stop having these near-death experiences. The stress is bound to shorten one's lifespan. Hang on… there's a logic I've missed there somewhere… I'm undead… near-death… ohhh, never mind. Anyway. Fortress Cross-Dresser - along with its long-term inhabitant - is no more, and that's the main thing.

At last I can rest. How I have longed to return once more to that state of peaceful slumber called death. I have proved myself as a hero, and will hopefully be welcomed into the Hall of Heroes with the other great warriors of legend. Or at least not openly mocked.

The trouble is, I won't exactly be able to pop back and fill in a last journal entry to let you know either way, will I. Or will I? Well… There's only one way to find out.

Advertisement